Tuesday, April 21, 2009

My Cat. The Drag Queen.

An animal lover practically from birth, I used to dream as a little kid that my family would buy a farm and I'd get to have a whole host of random pets. (Of course, cleaning up after the pets or any general pet-care maintenance were never included in those fantasies...I just wanted to, um, play with them and stuff.)

So that's why, when I was 12, I was thrilled when my parents finally let me get a cat. A cute, orange, fluffy kitten at first, he quickly morphed into a giant, 20-pound hairball with Very Big Opinions. For example, my brother Patrick wasn't allowed in the dining room. Like, ever. In addition, he had some strange...habits.

And now, as you've all been waiting for, I will share my Drag Queen Cat story. (If you remember from reading my query letter, yes, this cat did make it into A Bump in the Road.) One Saturday, in high school, my family was out all day at an amusement park. I had to attend a school function, so I didn't join them. After being gone all day, I stopped back home to quickly change clothes before heading out for the night. My friend was with me. We made it about two steps into the darkened kitchen before my friend tripped over something. I flipped on the light and saw...lots of pink.

Frilly pink Barbie clothes pulled out of storage bags from the basement. An old 1980's prom dress from the bottom of my closet upstairs. My mother's silk robe. And yes, some some my sister's underwear.

All scattered around the kitchen floor. With the cat sitting in the middle, more than pleased with himself. I swear, he was actually smiling.

I tried to explain to my friend that my cat sometimes gets lonely when we're all gone, so he leaves presents (Items which he determines are particularly attractive, based on the color, sequins or material--basically anything pink, sparkly or silky. Thus, the nickname Drag Queen Cat.) for us in the kitchen, hoping to entice us to come back.

She just gave me a look like, "Yeah. Sure." I don't think she ever came back.

I can't blame her. I mean, Seriously.


Jillian Cantor said...

What a funny cat! I've got a bunch of abnormal cat behavior stories myself :-)

Lisa Patton said...

Okay, Maureen, this is America's Funniest Home Videos stuff. I mean truly hilarious. I absolutely love this!!!

Tracy Madison said...

I love this story! I can just see a big, orange cat in the middle of pink lace, sequins, and ruffles. How awesome! Besides, I think it's so much better to have interesting pets. :)